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12
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MAY
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I am Michael Hoffman

My name is Michael Hoffman and this blog post is part of my effort to get Google and the other search engines to put this Michael Hoffman above those other Michael Hoffmans. You see, Michael Hoffman is actually a pretty common name. And one of these Michael Hoffman’s is a director — so he is in the Internet Movie Database (IMDb) and that helps his Google rankings. In fact, there are several Michael Hoffman’s in IMDb, including a sound and costume designer.

The thing that kills me, and got me writing here, is that the top ranking Michael Hoffman is an anti-Semite which is terribly ironic, and of course I will not link to him or even mention his name — may it be blotted out forever, amen — but he has all kinds of friends and foes linking to him and that raises his stock on Google.

If you don’t know this, one of Google’s main ingredients is links — links are like votes and the more folks that link to you, and the more significant they are, the higher your rankings. (It’s actually a lot more complicated than this, but if you get this much you are OK.) And so this post is another link connecting the search term Michael Hoffman to this website.

This Michael Hoffman was born in Baltimore, Maryland and is the son of Barbara and Donald Hoffman, brother of Alan and Carolyn Hoffman, and husband of Jessica Kaz and father to a bunch of kids. This Michael Hoffman is the CEO of See3 Communications, the founder of DoGooderTV and a member of the Board of Directors of AVODAH: The Jewish Service Corps. This Michael Hoffman lives in Chicagoland, and does not write fake history books or act in movies, unless you count this one. I am not an auctioneer, nor am I a professor of mathematics at the U.S. Naval Academy. Oy.

I am not a corporal in the Marine Corp. I am not a Partner at Skadden working on securities and financial matters, though I would trade salaries with him any day. I am not on the anthropology faculty of the University of Arkansas. I have never even been to Arkansas. I don’t sell real estate in Ocean City New Jersey, though I used to spend my summers in Ocean City, Maryland. I have never written an article in The Japan Times, though I have written articles on politics, fundraising and web marketing.

I recently learned about a documentary film called The Grace Lee Project. Grace Lee did a film about all the people named Grace Lee. From what I heard, it turned out to be a nice film about diversity, identity and stereotypes. I suppose many of us could make such a film. My kids won’t. Dorianna, Meital, Asher and Gili. They will totally dominate their Google search eventually. I hope they appreciate the gift.

I was with my wife Jessica in a baby store a few years ago and they had a list of the most popular baby names. Michael was the one on top for boys at the time and Jessica was the one on top for the girls. So I figure I have a lifetime of trying to be the #1 Michael Hoffman around. If you want to help me all you have to do is link here.

9 Comments

[...] A friend who knows I have written before about the fact that there are many Michael Hoffman’s out there, and that am connected with them through Google, that one is a notorious anti-Semite and that I am a little frustrated that I am not the #1 Michael Hoffman on search engines sent me this link: [...]

Great stuff :) . I’ve linked to here and mused on your situation on my blog.

[...] A while back I wrote a post about how there are just too many Michael Hoffman’s out there and with Google I am connected to all of them, even the anti-Semite Michael Hoffman who consistently gets top billing on Google. It is a story really about how the web connects people who otherwise would never know each other. Take a minute now to Google yourself and all of your top staff or consultants. You might be surprised at who else comes up. [...]

Hi,

I am Michael Hoffman too, and I’m with you. Don’t worry, I am not an anti-Semite.

Us cool Michael Hoffman’s have to stick together.

I would be happy to link with you if you would like to link with my page. Check out my site and let me know what you think.

Thanks!

Sincerely,
another Michael Hoffman

And such is the fate of all the Jenn Thompson’s in the world… I also compete with an IMDB Jenn Thompson and many many others. Luckily, my own ranking is moving up due to writing for onPhilanthropy.com, a newsletter and blogs following the world of philanthropy and fundraising.

You may find my similar attempt entertaining or useful. Check me out at http://www.whereisjohnwilson.com . Good luck. I will post a link over, maybe that will help!

Interesting effort. You might try publishing a book. That has helped my Google rankings, although my name combination is also fairly unique. I like that you named your kids to be more google-able. My colleague changed the spelling of his name to something very unusual to improve his findability in Internet search engines. In The Dispossessed, Ursula K. LeGuin posits a society where everyone has a unique name generated at their birth by a computer. They hold the name until they die, when it is assigned to someone else. Not very practical in real life, I know, but that would also mean we could all get our own domain name!

[...] See What’s Out There the blog of See3 Communications « I am Michael Hoffman [...]

This is Michael Hoffman…

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